#CIO #WokeWednesday

At least Right now.

I don't know how much I actually believed in the Cry It Out Method until I had Jaxon. He was a little shithead in utero and he's a little one now. 

A Little History:

First of all, his head is flat.

Second, he has history of terrible reflux. 

I know it's not Jaxon's fault, poor kid, but it's why we are where we are. 

He likes being nursed. He likes being rocked to sleep. He likes being held a certain way. All in all to say, he's a time consuming baby.

Now, I feel like a shitty mom to Bella. I feel like she's constantly getting pushed to the side for Jax. Luckily, she's finding comfort in her new Moana book. 

Devon is either sleeping, at work or just "not mommy".

I made their evening schedules to where I can have some guaranteed one on one time with Bella at the end of the day. So when I hear Jaxon crying during my solo time with Bella, I have to prioritize once again. This time it's easy. I know for a fact that he:

Is fed and full.

Has a clean diaper.

Is comfortable clothing wise.

Is actually tired.

He's fine. 

He is in the process of learning to self soothe. He's used to a comfy bed that constantly moved while he slept. Now he's in this wack ass crib with a hard mattress. I know it's my fault and I understand his frustration. However, I'd much rather deal with this now than when he is older, more aware and louder.

Now, I will say that Bella and I check on him roughly every five minutes but he usually falls back asleep after fifteen. 

This is what's working for my family right now. I know the Cry It Out Method has a bad rep but at the end of the day, I gotta do me and you gotta do you. 

This is your life. 

No one else is missing your sleep. Or your time with your family. Or your mommy time. 

Do what works for you. 

But at the same time, don't judge others because what they chose works for them.